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October 9, 2005

Hey hey hey and welcome! I'm SO excited to have Bucket back up and running first of all, and since I finally have a decent html editor (for free even!) I may just keep the site updated regularly! Wooha!

And now, onward with the first blog entry of Bucket EVER!

My Weekend of Weddings

Last weekend, on October 1st, Randy and I attended his best friend Mike's parents' renewal of vows for their 30th anniversary.

Here are Jenna and Jason at the American Legion Hall in Rochester, NH. It was a lovely hall, decorated in the highest quality 1970s style (which was awesome, since that was the theme of the ceremony).


Jason was kind enough to take a picture of Randy and I for me. We all felt kind of bad since Jenna and Jason were together, and Randy and I were together, and even MIKE had a date...


...and Doug was there with his Corona. :D But whatever, well all had a great time.


There was glitter decorating the tables, and among the glitter were little shimmery valentine's day hearts with words on them. Randy spent the evening sending me messages with the hearts. Here they say "4YOU BABE LOVE KISS FOXY HOT LUV ME+U". Later he also wrote, "KISS 4YOU FOXY HOT BABE". Isn't he romantic? :D


This is the amount of drinking I did that night. That's the toasting wine, which was served in tiny plastic shot glasses that had a line on them so you'd know how far to fill them to (nice of them, eh?). But Doug fucked it all up by filling them to the brim. :D The sick thing is that I was feeling it even after that whole SIP. I truly am a lightweight. :D


The boys had a fabulous time finishing off the rest of the bottle (Jason got Jenna some ice water so she could toast with us), and joking about how much Mike's dad looked like he was in Monty Python. Hee hee!


Jason is friggin HILARIOUS when he's drunk, and was having a grand old time torturing the little plastic swans that were decorating the tables. The swans contained little baggies of after-dinner mints (the kind that look and taste like chalk! Yay!) which were tied with bows. Jenna used these ribbons to decorate Jason's glasses. Doesn't he look pretty? :D


Here's Jason taking out his internal anger over the absolutely HORRIBLE music they were playing there on the poor plastic swan's head. And he actually succeeded in sawing the head off. Then he put it in Mike's top hat. "It's not the first time I've found a severed head in there," Mike said.


Perhaps it was his guilt afterwards, but Jason built the swan a new— and some might say better— head out of cheese, with a heart-shaped piece of glitter for an eye. And he even found the swan a mate. And they mate for life, you know. Way to go with the matchmaking, Jason! :D

Here's Jason after a few drinks. :D

Here's Beth demonstrating how large of a head Mike has. Ha ha! :D

Here's Doug dancing with Mike's mom. Oh the whiteness! :D

And here's Beth and Mike in his full wedding regalia. Mike even made a speech during the ceremony, which was very nice. Though he did NOT say anything about how he hopes his parents will be happy together for as long as they have left.

And here's Randy. He didn't know I was taking this. Hee hee hee! :D

The following morning (Sunday, 10/2/05), Randy and I awoke bright and early at 7:30am and drove five and a half hours down to Long Island, NY, for the wedding of my cousin Brian and his fiancee, Jillian. Here's Mom, Grammy, me and Randy outside of the church, about five minutes after we arrived. It was a gorgeous day!


The church was beautiful (and hypocritical, and oppulent despite Jesus preaching about how material things are unimportant, and the rich have as much chance of entering heaven as a camel has of fitting through the eye of a needle, but I digress...), and there were gorgeous stained glass windows. The service was AN HOUR AND A HALF LONG. Fucking BULLSHIT. I think it was my family's own personal revenge on my converting away from Catholocism. No, just kidding, but it DID suck. And I'm sure no one was pleased that I didn't go up for communion. But whatever, I gotta stay true to myself, yo! :D


Here's the wedding party. Note my drunk brother (the tallest guy in the back with the red hair and unshaven face) and the adorable son of my [drunk] cousin Mark. Jameson is the darling blond child in front.


Did I mention that my cousin and his new wife are HARDCORE REPUBLICAN MILITARY? The funny thing is that Jillian outranks Brian. He had to salute her during the reception. THAT was funny. They had pictures taken on this army jeep. That was also funny. Hey, whatever does it for them, right? :)


The sweetest moment during the GOD AWFUL reception, was when they announced that Brian would be doing a dance with his grandmother. Now, the thing is that all of Brian's biological grandparents have passed away. Brian is my dad's sister's son. But my mom's mother, who I call Grammy, has been coming to family functions on my dad's side since her husband, Grampy, died about 10 years ago. So when they announced that Brian would be dancing with his grandmother, he walked over to our table and looked at Grammy and said "That's you!" and whisked her away to the dance floor. She was SO HAPPY. It was the cutest, sweetest thing EVER. :) That is why I can still love my cousin despite his being a republican. :D No, he really is great.

The rest of the reception was pretty brutal. First of all, at a normal wedding, you arrive at the reception, sit down and chitchat for a while with your relatives, have dinner, relax for a bit, and then the dance music starts and the pain begins. NOT AT THIS RECEPTION. The pain began the INSTANT we arrived. There was NO TIME to emotionally prepare before I was hit with about fourteen intensely crappy country western tunes. It was PURE HELL.


Here's me and my cousin Michelle (Brian's sister). She's so happy now and the guy she's dating is a sweetheart, I'm really happy for her, she's been through some tough shit. I look like ass, but I think I'm doing okay considering I had done my hair at friggin 8am and it was about 9:30pm when this picture was taken! :)


Here's me, after I was FORCED to go up and "try" (ha ha) to catch the bouquet. They said that all of the "single girls" should be up there. I felt that it was wrong for me to go, since Randy IS my domestic partner and all. But they FORCED me, so I went. And Jillian threw the damn thing to her sister anyway so I didn't even have to raise my arm and pretend to try to catch it. This shit is humiliating and I will never do this crap when I get married.


Luckily, Randy seems to feel the same way about this. But that might just be because he has a collection of other garters at home in his parents' basement that he's caught at other weddings (I'm not kidding, I saw it today!). :D But Brian threw this one to one of his friends too, so I'm not sure if Randy even took his hands out of his pockets for this one. :)


The following morning, Randy and I drove the five and a half hours home, by way of the Throgs Neck Bridge, which costs $4.50 to cross. Fucking bullshit! It's pretty though.


And thus concludes my wedding-oriented weekend. Please post comments (below) and let me know what you think of the new format! Keep in mind, you don't need a username, there's no registering, and you can even type a fake name if you want now (ooooooh, what will YOU choose? :D). I'm really liking this new blog thing, it's a bit more work but it's still saving me time in the long run. Hope you all enjoy it! :)


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